He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
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