wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Randomize
