Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
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