I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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