So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
Sober January is a disaster.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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