i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
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