I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Randomize
