I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize