Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize
