How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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