it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Randomize
