Well I left you a voicemail but you probably won't be able to hear it because my mic is fucked up. I think you need to come down here and take it in for me.
I hate this phone so bad I'm going to lose all of my friends because of it
Yeah...you probably will...
well, you're marked off my christmas card list for next year.
Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
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