did you get engaged???
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Sext me about skeletons
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
