@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
