Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
Randomize
