all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Randomize
