Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
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