Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
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