Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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