Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
