I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
