he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Randomize
