what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Randomize
