I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Randomize