this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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