is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
