their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
