That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Randomize
