Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Randomize
