I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
Randomize