Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize