i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
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