no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
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