Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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