Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
