Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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