escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize