that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Randomize
