i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Randomize
