The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
