just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
Randomize
