Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Randomize
