ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
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