ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
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