and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Randomize
