Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
Randomize
