chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
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