She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
thus making me awesome and them whores
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
