Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
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