'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
