I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
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